Ocean

When I was little, I used to have this spot, my own secluded part of the area I lived in. It was an incredibly steep cliff, outstretched above the clamorous deep dark ocean, like a thin platform surrounded by a flat amount of deciduous tree lines. I would often sit at the very edge of the cliff's moss overgrown tail, as dangerous as it was, I was way too young to comprehend any risk of falling down into the hungry storming waters, I just loved the view, I loved everything about the Ascarian coasts, everytime you search up a picture, it makes you feel melancholic, it gives you this tight feeling of something crawling through your chest and bursting out by your lungs and heart. I would go there whenever I felt sorrowful or alone. The wild win would run through my hair and lash my face with cold yet refreshing zephyr, I felt like flying, with my arms stretched to the sides while drops from the mighty waves, crashing over the rocks underneath, fall onto my skin. Swinging my legs back-and-forth while they hang over the edge, rocking to the rhythm, seeing and feeling strong mildness overcoming my joyful spirit, graceful birds fly and disappear behind the clouds, the sky darkens, the Sun starts to set behind the horizon and the ocean soaks with pitch black ink. I feel free, not bound to anything substantial upon this planet, unattached to anything or anyone, I feel my own being act with my will and in unison, they sing to my cognition to break away. I was never afraid of the ocean, it reminds me of Her gentle, nostalgic touch to this very day. I remember how loving She was, such poor description, however, I've never met a person so gentle and caring, She was the embodiment of pure affection. I stood up in all that bewitchment, stripped of everything that lied in my head until the quick moment, an alarming flash of spark going through my entire body, that slow while when you realize all your essential subjects. My foot slipped on the wet mossy rocks and I fell, fell and fell, I kept falling. I looked up to see the birds flying above, I felt dread ripping my soul out, I felt pain striking through my nerves, I felt wave after wave consuming me and I felt myself sinking lower and lower into the ocean's wide opened maw. I've never been so reconciled to death, I accepted everything about it as last few bubbles escaped my mouth and lungs started to fill with freezing water. My body became so numb, I couldn't feel anything but myself surrendering to the ocean current. The only thing I could feel was my dying my brain cells upon not receiving any oxygen anymore. I was lucky.Because I wasn't alone, She was watching over me the entire time, She was always there to protect me if something would've happened to me, She knew me well, doubting yet simply worried, at some point-- I just had to slip as I kept tempting the fate by balancing on the edge between life and death. But She was there, like a guardian angel, her body brushed against mine and soon, I gasped for air like a wet dog, a small trembling pile of misfortune. I heard Her long cry from the bottom of the cliff, elegantly descending back into the blackness. An echo ran through my bones. Her nostalgic touchI still miss Her.